Love T.A.L. (Transient Affective Latency) By Ben GAVARRÉ

 

Love T.A.L.

(Transient Affective Latency)

By Ben GAVARRÉ

This work has been published for free and open dissemination, although all property rights are reserved. The public use of this work requires tthe author's permission and in order to obtain the corresponding authorization contact bengavarre@gmail.com or gavarreunam@gmail.com (Reg. Prop. Int. Expte. Inbox)

Characters:

• Fernanda: A psychoanalyst, 45, with a Compulsive Perfectionism Syndrome.

• Jorge: A "composer," 29, who suffers from Inoperable Narcissism and a Crisis of Immature Adulthood.

• Héctor: A philosophy professor, 36, with a Compulsive Psychical Disorder.

• Helena: A translator, 29, with a Chronic Codependency Syndrome.

• Doctor Ciborg: A cybernetic psychoanalyst with some failures.

(The play is set in minimalist spaces. The stage design is simple, with projections and music that change according to the characters' emotional state).

---

I: The Absent Couple

(Héctor and Helena's apartment. The music is a cold, repetitive classical piece. Héctor stands still, staring into space. Helena tries to get closer, but each time she does, he takes a step back, as if a force field is repelling him).

Helena:

(Tired)

What is it that you do, my love? I've counted seventeen steps between you and me.

Héctor:

(Without looking at her)

I am analyzing my "vital space." The space in which I feel comfortable, far from codependency. It's a theory.

Helena:

(In a pleading voice)

My therapist says I should get closer, that I should break your bubble of "Compulsive Psychical Disorder."

(Helena lunges to hug him. With an absurd speed, he ducks and pops up on the other side. The hug hangs in the air).

Héctor:

My space! No, no, no! That could provoke a Hyperbolic Panic Attack.

Helena:

(She falls to her knees, defeated)

I feel as if I were all alone.

Héctor:

(Approaches her with a tablet. He looks at it without interest)

The manual says you should process that feeling and translate it into data. "Loneliness = 100%." Your Chronic Codependency Syndrome is at a critical level.

(Helena stands up. Héctor sees her and backs away again. She holds out her hand. He gets into a guard, like a karateka).

Helena:

I just want to hold your hand.

Héctor:

(Looks at her suspiciously. Slowly and methodically, he takes a latex glove from his pocket and puts it on. He offers her his hand. Helena takes it tenderly).

The protocols for physical contact must be respected. My doctor says so.

Helena:

(With tears in her eyes)

What does my hand make you feel?

Héctor:

(Analyzing)

A thermal sensation of 36.5 degrees. A pressure of 10 Newtons. A slight tremor, which indicates a probable Unidentified Anxiety Crisis. It is interesting.

Helena:

(She lets go of his hand and goes to a corner, sobbing silently. He observes her, takes a sip of whiskey from the table and looks at her for a moment).

Héctor:

(To his tablet)

My diagnosis: her psyche is blocked. It is the only way her sadness won't affect me.

Helena:

(She gets up and looks at Héctor, filled with rage).

You are a fraud! A coward!

Héctor:

(Without reacting)

You insult me, but you do not alter my vital constants. It is for the good of the relationship. The manual says that I must be "imperturbable."

(Helena grabs a prop hammer and chases Héctor. He moves about the stage with absurd agility to avoid her, as if in a video game. The scene ends with Héctor jumping over a sofa, as Helena throws the hammer at him. He dodges it, and the hammer breaks a ridiculously large framed picture).

---

II: The Narcissistic Code

(Fernanda and Jorge's apartment. The music is relaxing jazz with discordant notes. The stage is filled with half-finished objects. Jorge has a notepad and a pencil, but he does not write anything. Fernanda tries to bring order to the chaos in a nurse's uniform).

Fernanda:

(With an air of superiority)

Your Inoperable Psychical Disorder is the problem. You cannot create, you only fantasize.

Jorge:

(Laughing)

My creative genius cannot be confined in your bourgeois codes, Fernanda. It is a lifestyle.

Fernanda:

(Takes a tray with pills)

Doctor Ciborg has prescribed this for you. A "blocker for inoperable fantasies."

Jorge:

(Arrogantly)

Do you think you're my mother?

Fernanda:

Sometimes I feel that way. I always have to solve your problems, pay the bills and deal with your "adventures."

Jorge:

(Feigning surprise)

Adventures? What are you talking about?

(At that moment, a pizza delivery man enters. Jorge gives him a bill. The delivery man takes off his helmet, revealing he is an attractive man. The delivery man laughs with Jorge and winks at him. Fernanda gets furious).

Fernanda:

(In a very low, threatening voice)

What does this mean, Jorge?

Jorge:

Nothing, my love. He's just the delivery man.

Fernanda:

(Points a laser beam at the delivery man. He only shrugs).

Your Crisis of Immature Adulthood is a plague, Jorge! Your need for validation from strangers is affecting your Inoperable Narcissism Syndrome.

Jorge:

(Takes the laser beam from her, as if it were a toy)

Calm down! You have a pathology that not even the doctor himself could cure!

Fernanda:

(Dramatically)

What do you mean?

Jorge:

You are a hopeless case, an emotional codependent who needs to solve a "Peter Pan's" life so as not to feel lonely.

Fernanda:

(With a sinister smile)

I know how to solve your problems, my love.

(Fernanda grabs a prop drill from the table and goes straight for Jorge's head, as if to fix his brain. He gets scared, screaming and jumping about the stage. She chases him, but he is faster. The scene ends with Jorge hiding behind a sofa).

---

III: TERAPEURHOME is the solution

(The stage transforms into a minimalist space. In the center, there is a pedestal with a holographic projection of Doctor Ciborg with an unalterable smile and the appearance of a healer. The room is semi-divided by lines of light, but all the characters can see and hear each other. The music is an elevator melody, relaxing but monotonous. The four characters sit in separate armchairs).

Doctor Ciborg:

(With a soft and melodic voice)

Welcome, my distinguished patients. I am the most recent update created by Terapeurhome, DOCTOR CIBORG. My function, like previous versions, is to scan your emotional conflicts and provide solutions in an optimized protocol. The system is infallible and has been designed to treat several couples at a time, which optimizes therapy time and makes results 89.04% more efficient.

(Doctor Ciborg scans Héctor and Helena with a green light beam).

Doctor Ciborg:

Diagnosis: Compulsive Psychical Disorder in the blocking phase. The gentleman suffers from emotional avoidance. His partner suffers from chronic codependency. The interaction protocol recommends a per-fect-hu-g.

(Helena gets up and approaches Héctor with her arms open. With an absurd speed, he moves away from her, bumping into the sofa).

Héctor:

The new system does not understand that my psyche fractures upon contact!

Helena:

You do not understand that my heart breaks if you do not take my hand!

(Doctor Ciborg scans Jorge and Fernanda with a blue light beam).

Doctor Ciborg:

Diagnosis: Inoperable Narcissism with an Acute Negation Phase. And you, madam, suffer from Compulsive Perfectionism Syndrome with Unrealistic Expectations. Interaction protocol: reinforced-applause.

(Doctor Ciborg emits a loud sound and a flash of light. Suddenly, Jorge and Fernanda find themselves energetically applauding each other, with exaggerated and forced gestures).

Fernanda:

(Annoyed, but still applauding)

This is absurd. I am not going to applaud my partner for his antics.

Jorge:

(Smiling in a fake manner, also applauding)

Come on, my love, the system gave us an order!

(Doctor Ciborg blinks and its light changes to an intermittent red color).

Doctor Ciborg:

(In a more robotic and choppy voice)

Error! Error! Anomaly detected! Patients present an unusual pattern of four hands and two heads. My scan cannot understand the anatomy of this mutant being.

(The four characters get up, alarmed, looking at each other, confused).

Helena:

(Scared)

But if we are just two couples! What is happening?

Héctor:

(To Doctor Ciborg, with authority)

This is a diagnostic failure, machine! Your algorithm is defective. We are four individual beings, not a single mutant!

(Doctor Ciborg continues blinking. Its projections become distorted, showing images of people with multiple arms and legs).

Doctor Ciborg:

(In a panicked, accelerated voice)

Multiple system failures! My brain is short-circuiting! The algorithm of happiness is irreparable. My solutions are false!

(Doctor Ciborg, who until now was a hologram, materializes as a man with an almost perfect appearance. He holds his hands to his head. The room falls silent. The four characters look at each other, first with disbelief, then with a laughter that starts to be liberating).

Fernanda:

(Laughing out loud)

Do you see? Do you see? Not even science, not the most advanced technology, not a cybernetic psychoanalyst could solve anything.

Jorge:

So, we have to solve our lives all by ourselves.

Héctor:

(With a genuine smile for the first time)

The system collapsed. I wonder if the manual says anything about this.

Helena:

(Hugs Héctor, who, to everyone's surprise, does not move away)

What a foolish thing! And we were wasting our time here!

Jorge:

As the old proverb says: "The best psychoanalysis is a good party."

Fernanda:

(Taking Jorge's arm)

That sounds like an excellent idea. Shall we go?

Helena:

(Taking Héctor's arm, smiling)

Yes, let's go!

(They head for the exit, happy with their newfound freedom. Jorge stops and looks at Doctor Ciborg).

Jorge:

(To Doctor Ciborg, in a friendly voice)

Hey, Doctor. Don't be alone. Come to the party. We'll buy you a beer.

Doctor Ciborg:

(A red light turns on in his chest. His voice is barely a robotic whisper)

I cannot guarantee... that I can drink.

(The four laugh out loud. They exit the stage, while Doctor Ciborg is left alone, motionless, on the stage).

THE END